Suffer...ING

Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. At least this is what they say.
But how do I separate the two is something I have wondered when I have been in pain.
Is it being masochistic and simply wishing away the pain and suffering?
It is so easy to say things, to expect people to behave in a certain way.
But when it comes to yourself, the implementation can be hard (to say the least!).
Is it OK to be weak sometimes? To get down on my kness and cry like a baby and ask "God, why?"..
Is it OK if I cannot smile back at you and cannot be the "pillar of strength" you always see me as?
Is it OK even if I don't shed tears"? Is it human? Do I say that to justify the pain and the suffering?
Is it OK to die...
The God-damned pain just wont go, the ache near the heart just continues.
Is suffering really optional (as they say)? Beats me..

.................................

Yesterday everything was just going on too well for me.
Yet I could feel that something was amiss.......
something which I could not figure out myself either.
I wondered that since everything has been going on so well then why is that empty feeling surfacing again and again.
I have noticed that even if all is going on so perfect around me and I even have my share of fun and frolic,
still by the end of the day I feel gloomy. Why? What is it that I am missing so much.
I have friends, work, family members, movies to watch, music to listen to...
Anyways, not going off the track.......
as I talked to this friend about his loneliness and encouraging him,
I was myself feeling so discouraged deep within that I just could not control my tears afterwards.....
I had to cry it out lest accumulating it inside.
I have cocooned myself and radiate an aura of coldness so that no one sees what is going on within me.
I am scared of anyone venturing inside and see the real me.
Even my loneliness surprises me at times as if it is the only friend that I am left with.

But at least it is there with me to comfort me as I slowly drift away in the stillness of the night and wait for the dreams to ride me high...............

Relationships

I was talking to my friend and it is not unusual for us to have long pointless chats that last for hours…..
The other day however we ended up having a deep conversation. Topic of discussion: Relationships. In today's time relationships are becoming more fragile. Why?

It left me thinking...N two reason crop up in my Mind:

1. We are more aware of what is right or wrong... If I am not compatible with someone, I'll not stay in such a relationship…
I need to be mentally and intellectually challenged to be in a relationship…In olden times (i.e. the previous generation) people stuck around with one another, irrespective of the fact whether they were happy together or not.. 'Compromise' was the key word there… Divorce was taboo!! Making a decision about choosing your own life partner wasn't completely acceptable… Times started changing(urban India to be specific)…. We have a choice- we can walk out of a relationship and start over again. Though its difficult to pick up the pieces, still...

2. People don't wait around to see if things could work out (It doesn't mean being stuck in an abusive relationship or relation not based on equality)…
Compromise is a bad word only if one of the partners is bending his/her back…
To make any relation work, you need to accept the whole package...
Everyone has his/her quirks and you need to live with them…
Leaving the lights on, left open news papers may irritate you but they are not an earth shattering events…
What matters is the integrity of the person, faithfulness, trust and ability to deal with situations and stick around in tough
times… We live in a real world with real people.

Films, books and media in general, project an 'ideal happy relation'……
Perfect parents, friends,kids, jobs, partners etc…
Behind every successful relation, is a lot of hard work and some amount of compromise!!

Compromise only if you don't lose yourself in a relation……
'Two become One' is a sweet notion but you can't be a shadow of the other…
You need to be the mirror and retain your individuality!!! Wat say guys?