02 May 2009

The - MEN


Love may be blind but marriage is an eye-opener. Oh yes, we hear a lot of these cliches especially when the wedding bells are just about to start tolling. And it’s usually the woman who’s at the receiving end of all these jokes. How unfair is the world?

Men claim that women change too much after marriage. The biggest problem with men is that they don’t change enough. Most men hate to change their lifestyle, their routine, their habits… And you cannot take the biggest step in your life without altering the way you think and live. Men generally feel it’s too much of an effort to change.

And all the things that were endearing before marriage, now grate on the wife’s nerves. “My boyfriend spends an hour in the shower - that?s why he always smells so good” said coyly before the knot is tied, changes to “My husband hogs the bathroom for HOURS! He’s driving me crazy!”

They say you never know a person until you live with them for a while. That’s when all the small things like leaving wet towels on the bed or exhausting all the hot water starts to really annoy you. But live together for a while with all these little grievances and if at the end of it all you realize you still love your spouse - that’s the real sign of a successful marriage.

Men do not have many adjustment issues. If the woman moves in with the husband and his parents, she has a lot to deal with. Suddenly she’s thrown into a new environment, with a new set of rules, new expectations are demanded of her and she finds it tough to cope. At a time like this, she needs her husband to back her up and be there to make things smoother. When this doesn’t happen, sparks fly.

If the couple is living alone, the wife expects the husband to pitch in with the housework. After all, the idea that certain things are a woman’s job is a thing of the past. In this case the man will definitely have adjustment problems. Now he has to not only get his own coffee but make a cup for his wife too.

There’s a saying that you shouldn’t get married in the morning, because you never know who you’ll meet that night. Meaning that the change happens the instant that knot is tied and the woman won’t recognize the person who was her devoted, loving boyfriend for so long.

What happened to the romantic man who’d be content to gaze at his girlfriend’s eyes for an eternity? What happened to the man who couldn’t bear to hang up even at 2 am?

Well, that man is now satisfied that he has the woman he wants. And more often than not, sits back to enjoy his conquest. Women might look at it differently, that the man is indifferent all of a sudden or that he doesn’t seem to care anymore. But it’s just that he doesn’t feel the need to demonstrate his love as openly as before. When someone is always around, you tend to take her for granted.

Of course there are men who are doting and as loving as they were before, if not more. If you end up with such a man, hold on to him with steel-reinforced claws! He’s rare!

There’s a tiny secret to marriage that will make it easier to enjoy it. The realization that men and women ARE DIFFERENT! You cannot expect the husband to behave the way the wife wants him to. He might forget to give her a rose for Valentine’s Day but she will remember to buy him that fancy mobile phone for his birthday. That doesn’t mean he cares any less than she does. It just means he’s more absent-minded and less thoughtful than her.

So he doesn’t show his feelings the way his wife visualized it. But he might show it with little gestures. Like fetching a glass of water or giving a much-needed back rub.

Sometimes it may seem like he’s reached the heights of insensitivity and he can’t possibly get any worse (though you’d be surprised). Well he always has a reason to behave the way he does, no matter how puzzling.

When women are upset, the man ought to know. They’re either sulking or banging things around the house. Or giving their men the silent treatment.

Men might endure it for as long as they can and then ask a perfunctory ‘what’s wrong?’ And if they get a sullen ‘Nothing’ in response they just let it go! This might shock women, but men are incapable of deciphering cryptic statements like ‘Nothing’. The woman actually means ‘Keep asking me until I tell? but the man doesn’t know that. He thinks ‘nothing’ means ‘nothing’. If women were more direct with their thoughts, perhaps men wouldn’t find them such an enigma. But then the whole charm is lost, isn’t it?

Men have a different way of showing they’re upset. They don’t. They’ll brood over it, perhaps snap a little bit, but more often than not their wives will have no clue about it until some day much later. Men don’t need to ‘talk’ about their issues like women do. The minute the wife’s upset, you can bet good money on the fact that within the next half an hour, she’s on the phone cribbing to her best friend.

It might appear as though men really don’t need women. As though the morning cajoling to get them to eat a healthy breakfast is unbearable nagging. But let the wife be away for a while and the husband misses that very same ‘nagging’. For they need to know that someone cares about them. And although they treat it with irritation when its there, they miss it when it’s not.

For a long time, it has been believed that women are the jealous lot. Well, here’s some flash news - men get jealous too - but don’t think its macho to accept that. They’ll ogle at other women in tight jeans and stretch tops but when it comes to their own wives it’s ‘Are you sure you want to wear that’ It seems a trifle transparent’. Its not that they don’t appreciate their wives, its just they want to be the only ones doing the appreciating. You’ll be surprised at the most broad-minded man wanting to protect his wife from probing eyes.

So here’s our conclusion. Men aren’t so bad after all. They might be cold and insensitive and indifferent and uncaring at times… but hey you’ve got to love ??

soo ironic isnt it..Men hardly change they want their life to be just like their bachelor's life but we as females have no options than to automatically take on everything upon oursleves..and still they say they are treating us equally???what the ***k